People often say things like the following about anger’s relationship to other emotions – but are they B.S.? They say:
- “Depression is anger turned inward.”
- “Anger is sadness’s bodyguard.”
- “Anger is just a manifestation of sadness.”
- “There is an anger iceberg (anger on top, with sadness, fear, or shame beneath).”
- “In men, sadness and depression show up as anger.”
While there is debate about these ideas among people in the field, my opinion is that these statements are misleading and, in some cases, wrong. I think these statements can promote misunderstandings about the nature of anger, depression, and sadness, as well as what their connection to each other actually is.
In my view:
- Anger is the emotion we experience when we believe that someone is purposely or negligently destroying (or trying to prevent us from getting) something we value. As an example, if someone were trying to hurt our pet, most of us would feel angry.
- Sadness is the emotion we experience when we believe something we value has been lost. For example, if our much-loved pet died, we’d likely feel sadness.
- Depression is the emotion we experience when we believe that we ourselves, or our future, contains nothing of value (e.g., because we think there is no action we can take to produce states we deem valuable). For example, if our pet were the only source of value in our life, and our pet died, we’d likely feel depression. Note: Many people, including many researchers, do not see depression as an emotion at all – only as a syndrome or disorder. I believe depression is also a distinct emotion that we can experience (though I could be mistaken on this point) – much the way that anxiety is an emotion, but there are also disorders of anxiety (like generalized anxiety disorder).
If I’m largely right about the points above, what then is the connection (if any) between anger and sadness and between anger and depression?
Well, some things can generate a mix of anger and other emotions.
We’d likely feel both anger and sadness if we believed that someone had permanently destroyed something we really value. For instance, if we believed that someone had purposely burned down our beloved home.
We’d likely feel both anger and depression if we felt that someone (or something) had rendered our future devoid of value. For instance, if we believed that someone had sabotaged our career prospects.
Additionally, emotions are not all equally available or comfortable to talk about. When we feel anger and sadness at the same time, we may be more aware of one of the two emotions, or more willing to express one of the two emotions to others, which can make it seem like one of them is hidden “beneath” the other.
But can other anger take the place of other emotions? Well, as one example, in some situations where we find it too emotionally difficult to blame ourselves for something bad that happened (that we, in fact, caused), we may blame others as a self-protective mechanism, which may mean we experience anger (towards these others), whereas if we accepted responsibility, we may feel depression rather than anger (e.g., due to viewing ourselves as worthless due to having caused the bad event).
On the flip side, our sadness or depression might suddenly turn to anger if we switched from believing that we had caused a great loss of something we value, to believing that someone else had been the cause of the loss.
Another way that anger can connect to sadness or depression is that if a person feels ashamed of being sad or depressed, and someone tries to get them to talk about their sadness or depression, they may respond with anger, for example, due to feeling pressured or judged.
So yes, anger can be connected to sadness or depression, though it isn’t always. And no, depression is not anger turned inward (they are distinct feelings), anger is usually not sadness’s bodyguard (though sometimes we can cast blame at others, leading to anger, to protect against blaming ourselves), and anger is not necessarily an iceberg (though we can have multiple emotions at a time, and some can be easier to notice or talk about).
This piece was first written on September 29, 2025, and first appeared on my website on November 3, 2025.
I think you make a great point that anger is a separate emotion from sadness or depression – though all three emotions could be triggered by the same source – for example, factory farming (the intensive confinement/mass production of animals for food) is perhaps the worst cruelty imposed upon sentient beings in history, causing billions of land animals and marine life intensive suffering on a daily basis.
The institutions that allow this to happen (i.e., government/corporations) cause me to feel angry – that such cruelties are allowed primarily for the sake of profit.
I am saddened that countless animals suffer daily unnecessarily while at the same time, millions of people suffer human health crises due to carcinogens and pollutants involved in the meat production/packing process and bacterias contaminate our water supply due to animal waste from intensive conditions.
And lastly, there often are feelings of depression – the sense that farming conditions will never improve – not when corporate interests are at stake. So why even try, right?
I would be curious to see your take on how these emotions also relate to anxiety, how they may benefit us, as humans, in certain situations (if at all – is there ever a situation where depression is beneficial?), and how they can relate to positive emotions as well.
Hi Katt. I absolutely agree that one event or situation can cause many emotions at the same time (like you illustrated). My view is that each human emotion exists because it helped our ancestors survive or pass on their genes in one way or another. That doesn’t mean, however, that those emotions help in every situation (I believe that sometimes they are counterproductive) and it doesn’t even imply that all emotions help on average in the world today (since the modern world is different than the world our emotions developed in, and our goals are not merely the survival of our genes).